Punxsutawney Phil wants to talk. You know how every year he takes the time to emerge from his home, schmooze with the mayor, and do the little shadow dance that inspired a movie starring Bill Murray? Right. Well, this time, he needs to level with you.

Winter isn't coming.

Haven't you seen how snowless New York City is? Haven't you read the climate report from the U.N.? Heard about the Parisians shutting off the lights of the Eiffel Tower as a plea to conserve energy? Mais non? He hasn't either. He lives in a hole in the ground.

But he's got this book that you might like. It's called An Inconvenient Truth. You should check it out.